Santino the Chimp

His name is Santino and he lives at the Swedish Furuvik Zoo.  Santino likes throwing things at the zoo visitors that gawk at him everyday, and his keepers do eveything they can to stop the violent behavior.  But recently, the zoo staff discovered stockpiles of ammunition (mostly rocks) all over Santino’s enclosure, as if he were preparing for battle.  The discovery has excited researchers studying animal intelligence since it suggests premeditation and forward thinking on Santino’s part, activities that require high intelligence and that are hard to prove in our animal neighbors.  But if Santino has planned this little rebellion in his cage, what could other animals we’ve angered or annoyed be planning?  If these disgruntled creatures need a leader, they might look to Santino.  The idea frightens organization like Homo Sapiens Against Animal Intelligence, which was created by its founder Jerry Bombadil in large part because of his concerns of the Planet of the Apes becoming a reality.

Read more about Santino here and here.

What do you think?  Could Santino be the face of the chimp apocalypse?

Check out our Chimp Apocalypse shirts and gear at The Loki Store.

Monkey Apocalypse Shirt by LokiMan

Santino & The Chimp Apocalypse by LokiMan

Vacation On Mars T-Shirt by LokiMan

Terraforming is the process of modifying the atmosphere and physical features of an alien world to support human life.  According to Nilton Renno, a University of Michigan professor quoted in the Astronomy.com article, “A large number of independent physical and thermo dynamical evidence shows that saline water may actually be common on Mars.”

Megalomaniac billionaire and frequent Loki Times contributor Nelson Rattathorn III says he plans to develop the first resort on Mars.

“I’ve spent millions on nano-molecular replicative scienctific research.  If there is even a trace amount of water on Mars, I’ll be able to replicate it on a massive scale.  Just think of surfing with only a third of Earth’s gravity.  You’d be able to rocket off a wave without fear of a painful impact on your way back down.  This is the next big thing.  Earth is out.  Mars is in,” said Nelson Rattathorn III to our reporters.

The news has rocked the tourism industry.  Real estate moguls are chomping at the bit to start their bidding on Martian real estate.  This could get ugly, but also become a much needed shot of adrenaline to the global economic crisis.

What would you do on a vacation to Mars?

Rats truly are amazing creatures.

Click here to read about the research.

The amazing little heroes are trained by a group of Belgian and Tanzanian researchers using the Pavlovian method, i.e. if the rats scratch at the ground where there is TNT, they get a treat.  They’re so light that even if they tread over a mine they won’t detonate it.

It’s no news that land mines are a major global problem.  But these rats, known as HeroRATS, are helping out, one bomb at a time.  For more information on the HeroRATS, click here. Stay tuned to The Loki Times as we continue our coverage on intelligent animals.

Read Article at the Times of London.

This yet again illustrates a disturbing trend in the rise of animal intelligence, and raises the question of, what other skills might these elephants be hiding?

The massive animals have long been feared by the organization Homo Sapiens Against Animal Intelligence.  The leader of the organization, Jerry Bombadil, has been an outspoken activist for years on the topic.

“It’s bad enough that dogs and cats are living in our homes, yet the ignorant have gone on to teach them so called tricks and skills.  Now this report on elephants, some of the largest animals on the planet who we have embraced as kind and intelligent social animals.  Has anyone taken a moment to consider these animals might have ulterior motives other than obtaining food and shelter?” – Jerry Bombadil, HSAAI.

Jerry would not elaborate on what these motives might be, wandering off after an fellow HSAAI member whispered something in his ears.  Our reporter picked up only the words ‘war’ and ‘experiments’.