Santino the Chimp

His name is Santino and he lives at the Swedish Furuvik Zoo.  Santino likes throwing things at the zoo visitors that gawk at him everyday, and his keepers do eveything they can to stop the violent behavior.  But recently, the zoo staff discovered stockpiles of ammunition (mostly rocks) all over Santino’s enclosure, as if he were preparing for battle.  The discovery has excited researchers studying animal intelligence since it suggests premeditation and forward thinking on Santino’s part, activities that require high intelligence and that are hard to prove in our animal neighbors.  But if Santino has planned this little rebellion in his cage, what could other animals we’ve angered or annoyed be planning?  If these disgruntled creatures need a leader, they might look to Santino.  The idea frightens organization like Homo Sapiens Against Animal Intelligence, which was created by its founder Jerry Bombadil in large part because of his concerns of the Planet of the Apes becoming a reality.

Read more about Santino here and here.

What do you think?  Could Santino be the face of the chimp apocalypse?

Check out our Chimp Apocalypse shirts and gear at The Loki Store.

Monkey Apocalypse Shirt by LokiMan

Santino & The Chimp Apocalypse by LokiMan

As many of you know, we’ve been covering intelligent monkey news at The Loki Times ever since we launched our website.  In fact, we kicked off our website with this post about Cyborg Monkeys.  The subject fascinates our researchers and writers, but terrifies Jerry Bombadil, founder of the extremist group Homo Sapiens Against Animal Intelligence.

HSAAI T-Shirt #2 by LokiMan

Bombadil fears a Planet of the Apes scenario more than anything.  This new data about internal monkey GPS systems has shaked him to the core.  The following is Bombadil’s response to inquiries from our news team: “Monkey GPS?!?!  That’s just great, freakin’ wonderful.  Son of a bitch!” *click*

Jerry later called back to apologize, saying “We were worried about the government being able to track our every move, but now we should worry about these monkeys.  They can find you…anywhere.”

Let us know what you think.  Monkey GPS: Impressive, or Terrifying?

Jerry Bombadil, spokesman for HSAAI (Homo Sapiens Against Animal Intelligence), is angered by the recent acceptance of Cholla’s art into an international exhibit dominated by human art.  Bombadil in a recent statement:  “This is a very slippery slope.  The more we encourage animals to act and behave like us, and worse yet, the more we accept this behavior, the more we blur the line between us and them.  What’s next?  A Chihuahua Mozart?  We don’t want to empower animals anymore than we already have.  At some point, they’re gonna get wise and try and take a bigger slice of the pie, and they’ll take it by force, mark my words.”

Bombadil’s ominous words and extreme stance on the issue come as no surprise, considering his organization’s history.

Join the HSAAI cause with one of their shirts:

HSAAI T-Shirt #2 by LokiMan

Read more about Cholla acceptance into an art exhibition.

Visit Cholla’s webpage.

Rats truly are amazing creatures.

Click here to read about the research.

The amazing little heroes are trained by a group of Belgian and Tanzanian researchers using the Pavlovian method, i.e. if the rats scratch at the ground where there is TNT, they get a treat.  They’re so light that even if they tread over a mine they won’t detonate it.

It’s no news that land mines are a major global problem.  But these rats, known as HeroRATS, are helping out, one bomb at a time.  For more information on the HeroRATS, click here. Stay tuned to The Loki Times as we continue our coverage on intelligent animals.

Read Article at the Times of London.

This yet again illustrates a disturbing trend in the rise of animal intelligence, and raises the question of, what other skills might these elephants be hiding?

The massive animals have long been feared by the organization Homo Sapiens Against Animal Intelligence.  The leader of the organization, Jerry Bombadil, has been an outspoken activist for years on the topic.

“It’s bad enough that dogs and cats are living in our homes, yet the ignorant have gone on to teach them so called tricks and skills.  Now this report on elephants, some of the largest animals on the planet who we have embraced as kind and intelligent social animals.  Has anyone taken a moment to consider these animals might have ulterior motives other than obtaining food and shelter?” – Jerry Bombadil, HSAAI.

Jerry would not elaborate on what these motives might be, wandering off after an fellow HSAAI member whispered something in his ears.  Our reporter picked up only the words ‘war’ and ‘experiments’.